The Importance of Establishing a Good Mental Health Routine
We take many steps to look after our physical health—eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest. But do we take the same care of our minds? Prioritising mental health is just as important.
One of the biggest misconceptions is expecting to feel happy every day. This isn’t realistic, and it’s unfair to ourselves. Social media can make us believe that everyone else has a perfect life, but that’s simply not true. It’s crucial to remember that having bad days doesn’t mean we’re failing.
Emotional burnout is a key warning sign. If you constantly feel sad and no longer find joy in your daily parenting tasks, it’s a sign that you need outside support. And that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with admitting that you’re struggling.
Accepting Reality and Finding Small Moments for Yourself
Raising a non-verbal child with autism or Down’s syndrome can be challenging. As caregivers, we often feel like we are the only ones who can care for our child, which can lead to resentment and exhaustion. However, it’s important to remember that we are individuals beyond our roles as parents, carers, or partners.
Small changes can make a big difference. For example, taking a few minutes in the morning to get ready before waking the children can provide a sense of control and well-being. It’s not about grand gestures but about small actions that remind us that we matter too.
Managing Anxiety and Stress
Sometimes, we feel anxious or overwhelmed, and that’s normal. We don’t always have to fix it immediately. Allowing ourselves to feel sad or anxious for a few days—without the pressure to “snap out of it”—can be healthier than constantly battling our emotions. However, if we reach a crisis point, where our physical and emotional well-being is in jeopardy, seeking professional help is vital.
The idea that we can “follow five simple steps to happiness” is often unrealistic. Happiness is not a destination but an ongoing journey. As caregivers, we need to be kind to ourselves and accept that some days will be harder than others.
Barriers to Mental Well-being
- Believing We Are the Only Ones Who Can Care for Our Child
When we convince ourselves that no one else can care for our child, we end up exhausted. Taking a break is not only good for us but also for our children. A mother who takes a short holiday may realise that she has been living in a constant state of burnout. Looking after our mental health makes us better caregivers.
- Communication and the Role of “Interpreter”
If our child struggles with communication, we become their voice. This can be draining. Finding strategies to share this responsibility can help lighten the load and allow us moments of rest.
- Lack of Time for Self-Care
Even small moments of self-care, like taking five minutes to breathe deeply or applying a favourite hand cream, can add up over time and help us feel better.
- The Cost of Rest
Many forms of relaxation and self-care require money, but there are plenty of free ways to find peace. Going for a walk, listening to music, or taking a warm shower are accessible ways to recharge.
- Lack of Sleep
Sleep is crucial for both physical and mental health. As caregivers, we must prioritise it as much as possible.
- Managing Everything Outside the Home
Sometimes, we feel pressured to enrol our children in every available therapy and activity. But “more” is not always better. We shouldn’t feel guilty for not doing it all. It’s impossible to manage everything alone, and the responsibility should be shared between schools, families, and support networks.
The Importance of Accepting Help
When someone offers help, instead of asking, “How can I help?” it’s more effective to say, “I’m going to do this for you.” Often, we don’t even know what we need, so direct assistance can be incredibly valuable.
Changing Perceptions in Society
The pandemic forced us to acknowledge that everyone, at some point, feels lonely, anxious, or depressed. This has helped normalise these feelings and made it easier to recognise that caregivers also deserve to care for themselves. If we don’t prioritise our well-being now, we risk burnout in the future.
If we work to change society’s perception of self-care for caregivers, we can improve the quality of life for many families. Seeking professional help is a valid option, and free support is available.
Resentment and frustration don’t mean we’re failing—they’re part of the journey. What matters is finding balance and reminding ourselves that we, too, are important. Taking care of yourself is part of taking care of your family!
